So today was like many other days. I got up, logged on and checked my email hoping to find something from you. It’s something I will do several more times today each time hoping to get a little gift from you in my in box. One thing is for sure, the name I want to see in my in box is yours.
But alas, it was not meant to be today. It breaks my ears a little each time. But that’s ok. It is how it is. Even when you do write me it sometimes seems like you may not have read my previous emails. Your replies are always short and seldom touch on anything I have sent you. Believe it or not when that happens I actually question if you still love me.
Seeing that email in my inbox always makes me hopeful thinking that you are going to come back for me and we are going to run away together, and I’m going to tame the wild animal inside you. Not cage you just tame you. And when it is not there, I wonder to whom do your emails flow. I know that’s retarded because you hate email and I should not let it affect me in any why, but it does.
Each time I log on my heart starts to race at the thought of some kind word from you. But today it was not mean to be. o I went back and read some of your old emails several actually, and that is not always a good thing either because I frequently re-run those emotions as well.
I can’t even begin to tell you how much I miss you and more importantly love you.
OK I admit it again. I’m pretty fucked up over you.