“What the fuck are you doing?” Or other variations on that question like “What the fuck are you doing with her?” or even worse “What the fuck are you doing TO her?”
You once said “You know you’ve totally fucked me right?” You said your expectations of men changed because of me. Your expectations from a man changed, when I treated you like a woman, instead of whatever others in the past had treated you like.
You know that’s what that is right? I treat you like a woman. Not like a vagina, or a piece of eye candy, or a second income or weekend entertainment or whatever. In a way I don’t treat you in any special way because I simply treat you the way every woman should be treated. But then that is special, because most men are too selfish or stupid to invest that kind emotion and dedication in someone.
What you said was that you were fucked because now that you have seen the way I treat you, that there’s no way you will find a man who will measure up to me, and the way I treat you.
I was kind of shocked at the time. I think most men see you and think, “unattainable” because you are such a beautiful, and talented, smart woman. But you really meant that when you said it! I just shake my head and say to myself “What the FUCK?” Why don’t you see how incredible you are? You simply need to accept that you are worth it and hold out for a man who treats you that way.
It’s as simple as that. Don’t fuck around with any man who is not the kind of man you want, that’s all it takes. No matter how fun they are, no matter how lonely you are not matter what, you end up with the men you spend time with. Walk away, don’t stay around, don’t invite them into your life until you know.
This was the first time I asked myself “What the fuck are you doing TO her? You are so incredible that you can have anyone or anything you want, but you can’t see that, and you settle. You settle for lessor men, meaning men who are less than you need, deserve and are worth. It makes me wonder if I’m hurting you by showing you a type of what you want but won’t work to get.
I am the kind of man you hope for because I am that kind of man, not because you make me that way. I’ve said this many times that you give yourself completely to men who are not who or what you want. You work for them as if you need to earn their attention and love from them, that I simply give you. You sleep with them, you care for them, and you entertain them and play with them as if somehow you will earn the affection and attention from them that you receive from me, when that is just not who they are.
They are the way they are because that’s who they are, and that’s who they will remain, no matter what you do. You don’t have to earn anything. Just as I am the way I am because that is who I am, and who I have been for the last 8 years. You don’t have to earn anything or prove anything, you simply need to find the right man and not involve yourself with him until you know you have found the right man. That’s the trick. But you did it with me didn’t you? It is no different, none at all, as hard as that might be to swallow and as hard as it might be to live.
You will hate me for saying this but the most recent three men in your life minus the nice guy (J), are all the same kind of men. All cut from the same type of cloth. I’m sorry for saying that and I am not judging them by saying that. I am point it out to you. They are all so similar its easy to see from here.
You told me one time that I was selfish. It hurt when you said it because it was so true, and I hear “What the fuck are you doing with her?” Why don’t you just leave her alone and let her go about her life. Stop interjecting yourself into her life. Let her live it and get out of her life.
But there are two problems with that and they both boil down to one thing. I love you. (I need you, and you need me) I am motivated by my concern for you. Yes I am selfish, but I care for you because I want you to be happy. I am in your life because making you happy, makes me happy! And although I can’t defend against the fact that I am selfish, you know that I am also generous, and it is not selfishness that motivates me.
Yes I’m married and yes I’m an asshole and a cheater and I’m just like everyone other guy and that is how you define me as selfish, and I am. There is no justification for it. But then you also know that as complex as it would be to explain, that I am not just like every other man.
- Done (xlithiumrainbowx.wordpress.com)
- I see your problem with misogyny, and I’ll raise you a misandry (sexplicitdiscussions.wordpress.com)
- I want more, but I’m afraid to go and get it. (weemanmike.wordpress.com)
- Women Want Good Boyfriends, Not Just Any Boyfriends (rawstory.com)
- 47 DAYS. Eat shit Sam McBride (nzfiend.wordpress.com)
- 25 June Catnip I wrote this the next day. It’s not where I’m at now but where I was. (primalnights.wordpress.com)
- If You’re Not Watching Copper, Why Aren’t You Watching Copper? (sleepbeforewaking.wordpress.com)
- On the Other Hand (primalnights.wordpress.com)